''Hey Katarina. Maybe I am a bit late with my question but how are you doing small talk? I am always struggling to talk with people that I don't know but I also do not want to be rude. Could you help me?''
M. M.
Dear M. M.,
thank you for your question!
Engaging in small talk can be an excellent way to build connections and make a positive impression in any social setting. However, I do understand that it can also be a nerve-wracking task to perform, especially if we are introverted or simply don’t have the right tools.
But there is no need to worry! Here are five tips to help you master the art of small talk and follow proper etiquette while doing so:
1. Start with Polite Greetings
Before diving into conversation, always begin with a polite greeting such as "Hello" or "Good morning" followed by a quick introduction of yourself. This will help to break the ice. Hopefully, the other party will reciprocate the greeting and introduction. Right after, you can ask a neutral question, such as ’’How are you enjoying the event?’’
Open questions are always better than closed questions as they allow for conversation to flow more naturally.
2. Discuss Neutral Topics
If we meet someone for the first time, discussing neutral topics such as weather, hobbies, travel, or current events is recommended. Neutral topics keep the conversation light and enjoyable, avoiding potential discomfort or disagreement. We cannot expect others to share our opinion in every aspect of life, so bringing up controversial topics like religion, politics or gossip could result in more harm than good.
3. Show Genuine Interest
Showing genuine curiosity about the other person’s interests and experiences creates more opportunities for a smooth conversation and makes the other party more likely to engage. For example, if your conversation partner speaks about their interest in skiing, you can use that as a stepping stone for your next question (’’What are your favourite destination for skiing?’’)
4. Be Mindful of Personal Space and Tone
Remember to always maintain a respectful physical distance and speak at a moderate volume. Respect personal space and avoid speaking too loudly or too softly. The recommended personal space differs from country to country, but we should avoid ’’buddying-up’’ with our conversation partner and pat them on the shoulder right after meeting up.
5. Use Appropriate Body Language
Body language is a very important yet often overlooked form of non-verbal communication. Our eyes and facial expressions tell more about our feelings than we are willing to admit. Remember to make eye contact, smile, and use subtle gestures such as head nodding. Avoid overly expressive or dramatic movements.
Bonus Tip: Express Gratitude and Politeness
When the conversation comes to an end, end it gracefully with polite expressions such as "Thank you for the chat" or "It was nice talking with you." If the opportunity is there, you can exchange business cards at this point too.
Final Thoughts
Mastering small talk is about balancing politeness, genuine interest, and cultural awareness. By following these tips, you'll be well-equipped to engage in pleasant and respectful conversations that will help you build meaningful connections.
Good luck!
Yours sincerely,
Katarina
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