''Hello Katarina. I have a question about elevators. If a woman and man are about to enter an elevator, who goes first? I fight about this with my husband.''
K.
Dear K.,
thank you for your question!
I am sorry to hear that elevator etiquette has turned into a quarrel between you and your husband.
However, it doesn’t catch me by surprise as elevator etiquette can be a rather tricky topic to decode, as it has multiple ways of interpretation. So let’s take it step by step:
Traditionally, it has been considered good manners for a gentleman to let a lady enter any location first while holding the door for her.
However, just like with any rule, there is an exception to it and that includes - you guessed it - elevators. In the past, elevators weren’t as safe and well-constructed as today, which made them a place of potential danger (alongside pubs or pavements).
As safety always comes first, the traditional form of etiquette recommends men to board an elevator first to sort of 'proof-test' it. With that being said, the safety of elevators has come a long way and in most cases there is no need for any proof-testing anymore.
So if men present women with the option of entering an elevator first, usually they believe they are showing a form of chivalry and we don’t necessarily need to correct them.
Interestingly enough, the reverse applies when leaving the elevator. In this case, the man should let the woman off first (leave the supposed place of danger) and follow right after her. It is gratifying to witness this act of chivalry in real life, but please remember to take everything with a pinch of salt and always evaluate each situation individually. If the elevator is at full capacity, dwelling on all women leaving first could result in an awkward crawling out situation with an unwanted skin-to-skin contact.
I hope this will help to resolve the dilemma - or perhaps it gave you just another food for thought? 🙂
Yours sincerely,
Katarina
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